Self Sabotage is a psychological trap people fall into far too often. The reason? Lack of self love. It happens to people who are kind and considerate, as well as those who can't control their negative responses to even small issues.
Guilt lies under it all. The source of that guilt could have originated at an early age, perhaps caused by a family member or traumatic event. Often our behaviors remind us of that shame and it haunts us throughout life, showing up as self sabotage.
If you suffer from recurring "preoccupations" which sabotage your life, spend some quiet time pondering the source of your own guilt. Identify those who may have participated, then forgive them. Then forgive yourself.
This act of forgiveness is not for the sake of others whom you forgive, it's for your sake. Properly and permanently done, forgiveness lifts a burden you've may have carried around for years.
Make loving yourself your primary goal. Say, "I love myself" 20 times a day until it becomes a part of your belief system. If you find that hard to do say instead, "I want to learn to love myself." Do that until you can shift back to the simple more direct statement.
Self Sabotage prevents you from achieving the life you want because you don't believe you deserve it. But the truth is you do deserve to have the good things you want in life.
Begin now to use the most powerful psychological tool there is, forgiveness. If you do, it will dramatically improve the course of your life.